Our First Live Presentation

While 2021 has definitely been more challenging than we hoped, we have continued to push forward and get more engaged and involved where we could, and this month we finally had our first, in person, live presentation at Florida Power Exchange.

Bridging the Gap Between Swinging and Kink

We offered them many workshops, and this was the one they wanted. This is a lively discussion where we tap some of the major myths, misunderstandings, and points of contention between Swingers and Kinksters, and offer concrete ideas for those interested in bridging those gaps. For us, this is an interesting choice… we love it, because this discussion is at the heart and soul of everything Swinky Life is all about. On the other hand, it is a round table conversation, and not a class, and I love teaching people, and it can be challenging for me to stay out of “Teacher” mode and let others talk. But the opportunity to present is always so much of a benefit all around, that regardless of what we are asked to do, we are always thrilled. So we took our last presentation of this workshop, which had been online, and changed it up to be current and ready for a live audience.

From the perspective of a Kinkster…

One of the challenges we have quickly identified is that we created Swinky Life, and we tend to approach all such conversations, from the perspective of a swinger who is interested in kink… but much of the interest we are getting in presenting and teaching is actually from kinksters interested in swinging. We are, ourselves, intrigued by the fact that it is a bit more of a challenge for us to speak from that perspective. We ARE kinksters, but for some reason, we find it easier to teach swingers about the joys of kink than the other way round; and this may be insightful to our own biases. As a team who is each very aware of their own continuing growth and development, we love opportunities to stretch our own mindset while trying to help others as well.

But we made it work…

And actually, it was WAY better than just “It Worked”…It was awesome!

Our audience was smallish, a little more than a dozen folks, so we immediately rearranged the chairs into a circle and had a small, intimate conversation. Our group was diverse, well informed, opinionated, and willing to participate… in short, perfect.

Our Message Resonates

Our biggest takeaway, as presenters and instructors, was that our message resonates incredibly well. We go into these conversations with a bullet list of things we want to touch on and discuss, but we also want to engage with our audience, hear their concerns, and if possible, help and add insight. This makes for a lively, interactive conversation where we provide whatever input we can, in this case as swingers, to the concerns from the kinkster side of the conversation. Over and over, our concerns, topics, and important points were completely in concert with our audience. We see this over and over… we created Swinky Life to address what we felt were valid concerns in the communities, and conversations like this continually tell us we are on the right track.

FPE was a GREAT Conference

Aside from doing our presentation, we all attended multiple track sessions over the weekend. As always, some were better than others, but overall, we found the speakers to be very knowledgeable and professional, and the topics to be timely and relevant. As bloggers and podcasters, we are keenly aware of the notion of “Evergreen” content, and sometimes it can be a bit challenging to attend yet again ANOTHER Kink 101 track… but honestly, everyone brings their unique perspective, and we learn new ideas to present in our own workshops as the entire community grows and changes year by year. We also constantly learn important lessons about being a teacher and presenter by watching others with so much more experience than us. The crowd there was diverse and amazingly interesting, and friendly, and open, and we felt oddly at home while not feeling at home in many ways. There is SO MUCH diversity here that we were challenged by ideas we know of but have no first hand experience with… no matter what your kink, you will be welcome here, and you will find something for you. You will also find a lot of things you are not at all interested in, and talking with those people and learning about their kinks is definitely part of the value.

The Dungeon

And then, there was the Dungeon. First and foremost, I want to say… and I (we) have spent a lot of time in a lot of dungeons… and this was first class. For a conference put on in a hotel, obviously this was not a permanent dungeon, so the walls were not painted like stone, the floor was not concrete, and there were some practical limitations to what you could do. But beyond that, it was well equipped, it was clean, it was very well managed by great DM’s, the playlist was AMAZING, and the people were great.

We spent the better part of two nights in the dungeon, and all four of us had an awesome time. We did rope work and impact play, and Myrina and I did full suspensions. To be in the environment, with the people, in the moment, with the music, and the unbelievable energy, and the amazing display of all manner of behaviors (with a special shout out to the team with the glow stick bracelets decorating the ballsack)… it is hard to explain how freeing, validating, comforting and encouraging the experience was. If you are REMOTELY interested in kink, and have never been to an actual dungeon, GO!!! It will change your life forever.

I remember on our last night, after our final scene, sitting, with the endorphins in full runaway overdrive, blissful as can be, looking around the room and thinking, “All of these behaviors, and so many people would be shocked and offended, and concerned for the safety of some of these people… and all I see are amazing, happy, expressions of deep love and trust and intimacy”

The Connections

While our whole bag is bringing Kink to Swingers, still, if I am being honest, we felt a bit out of our depth. This group takes Kink to a whole different level than we do, and we have much to learn from them as well as much we would like to teach them. But we are not, yet, a deep part of this community. We are very much working to change that, which is one reason we were so excited to be here. We love rope and impact and a little bit of mind fucking, but we are not (yet!) into fire play, knife play, furries, littles, latex, etc. There is so much diversity here, and so much to explore. So we were thrilled to connect, and to talk, and to meet, and to compare… something I learned in my professional life long ago, this is truly what conferences are for. It is not about what tracks you go to… it is about what people you meet, and what impression you make on them, and what follow up you have the week after. And we made a few great connections and we are still following up now, with plans for new events in 2022, and we are so excited. Check back here soon for news as these plans evolve.

The Morning After

Ultimately, all good things come to an end, and so it was with this as well. But we left feeling energized, supported, encouraged, amazed, and enthused for the future.

The Presenters Were Amazing

To all of our fellow presenters, thank you. Presenting is not easy… there is a lot of work to get ready, it can be challenging and exhausting to do, and you never know how the audience will truly react. Thank you for being brave, putting yourself out there, and trying to help someone else understand why we love what we love.

The Dungeon Was Amazing

To our fellow dungeon mates, thank you for being you, for being willing to share, for embracing your kink no matter what, for sharing your skills, and imagination, and support, and confirmation, and energy, and love of diversity. There is no experience on earth like a good night in the dungeon, and it is all because of the people there.

Thank You FPE for Allowing Us to Present

If you have never been to Florida Power Exchange, you should go soon. It is a great event, and we are thankful for the opportunity to be a part of it. If you have never seen us present yet, come back here soon and see what we are up to. This year is promising, and we have lots of irons in the fire, and hopefully Covid will not shut us down again. We will be making changes on the site to make it easier for you to keep track of what we are up to and where we are going next. We hope to see you soon!